Confusion Doesn't Get the Final Say
A 6-Step Filter for Digital Discernment
Last week, I was enjoying the sun shining through my living room window and having my study time. The question asked how we discern between truth and error. It hit me how much this applies to the way we consume everything online, and it took me down a rabbit hole of exploration. We’re constantly being hit with "facts," but if we’re being honest, most of what we see isn't actually a fact; it’s a reaction or a narrative.
In the book, I talk a lot about how trauma isn't a straight line. It’s messy. And when the world tries to force a messy story into a clean box, we lose the truth.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the constant noise, here’s a filter I’m starting to use to keep my head on straight.
1) Separate the facts from the feelings
Take any big scandal or viral story. Usually, three distinct things are happening:
Facts: What is actually verified.
Narratives: How people are interpreting those facts.
Reactions: The outrage, the fear, and the agendas.
Most of us don’t slow down enough to separate these. We see a reaction and mistake it for a fact. Discernment starts when we ask: “What do I actually know versus what is just being said about it?”
2) Notice what’s being amplified
The world isn't neutral. It highlights certain angles and buries others. I’ve learned to start asking: Why is this getting attention right now? Who benefits from this version of the story? This isn’t about becoming cynical or a conspiracy theorist. It’s just about becoming aware. Truth can handle scrutiny; manipulation can’t.
3) Truth doesn’t play favorites
This is the hardest part. It’s so easy to defend people we like and attack people we don’t. We naturally want to believe things that confirm what we already think.
But staying grounded means our filter has to be higher than "does this help my side?" We have to ask: Would I still believe this if it involved someone I actually respect? If the answer is no, it’s not the truth we’re looking for; it’s a win.
4) Watch for the "Right Now" energy
A lot of what we see online is driven by emotion first and truth second. If a post makes you feel immediate outrage or an urgent need to "repost this before it’s deleted," just pause.
Not because the info is definitely false, but because you’re being pulled to react before you’ve had a chance to process. Truth invites you to examine it; manipulation demands you react to it.
5) Stand on what stays steady
Even when a situation is a total mess, and we don’t have all the details, some things never shift:
Abuse of power is wrong.
Exploitation is wrong.
Justice matters, even when it’s delayed.
You don’t need every single detail of a headline to still stand on what you know is right.
6) Accept the "I don't know"
This is the part we all hate. Sometimes, you won't get full clarity. You’ll see partial info, and things won’t resolve cleanly.
Discernment isn't always about having the full answer. Sometimes it’s just saying, "I know what aligns with integrity, and I know what doesn't—even if I don't know everything in between."
The Bottom Line
You can care deeply about what’s happening in the world without being consumed by it. You can stay informed without spiraling.
When something hits your feed today, just take a breath and ask:
What do I actually know vs. what’s being said?
What emotion is this trying to pull out of me?
Does this align with what I know to be true about justice and integrity?
Do I need to respond right now... or can I wait?
Confusion doesn't have to get the final say. We can choose to stay centered, even when the story is still unfolding.